No more shots. . . . Maybe someday!

I walked into my neurologist appointment today with one this on my mind.

"When can I stop giving myself 

these damn shots?"

Dr. Masood asked me how I was feeling.  I told him I feel pretty good.  I get tired a lot, by memory is still not what it used to be and I am sick of Copaxone!  He asked me why and I told him 

IT HURTS!!

 

He said us, being humans, forget how bad an exacerbation is.  Time does this to us and we forget how

scary it is when our MS flare's up.  I have to take that into consideration when it comes to switching treatment options.  He reminded me that I could wake up tomorrow and the MS could attack my spinal cord and I would be paralyzed from the waist down.  I still wasn't convinced.  I have been healthy overall and I still want to be done with these shots.

 

He went on to say that he does not trust these new treatment options that are oral.  He said they are so new and so few of people that are opting for this treatment they are not really sure what it does to your body.  His concern is what they do to your white blood cells which he believes will one day lead to the big C, Cancer!  OK this got me a little concerned because cancer scares the crap out of me. 

He finally said insurance would not help me pay for another treatment when the current one that I am on it working for me.  Copaxone costs $45,000/year before insurance!!  The oral therapy costs $42,000/year which would have to come out of our pockets.  

That is when it hit me.  I am not switching over to the pills, not at this visit and probably not for a long time.  Time to buck up, go home and give myself another shot before bed.  I cant be too upset about this though.  I am thankful that I have this medicine that keeps me healthy and to be able to share moments like these with my family. . . 

 

 

 

Pictures

If you have ever been to my house you have seen the over abundance of photo albums. 

I love taking pictures and I always print them out.  I can’t stand just having them stored on my computer.  I need to have something that I can hold in my hand to look at.  When I pick my pictures up I always take the time to write on the back of them with who is in the picture, the kids’ age, where the picture was taken along with the date.  My mom has done this forever and I have always followed her lead.   



I always have my camera on me whenever we go on family outings to capture moments that I will cherish forever.  My kids have been so accustomed to me taking so many pictures they are trained with their smiles ready for me.  Every year over MEA weekend in October we take a long weekend and go to Duluth.  Last fall when we were up there the kids were throwing rocks into Lake Superior and I wanted Makayla to put her hat on because it was cold outside.  She either didn’t hear me or was ignoring me so I repeated her name a few times.

“Makayla.”

“Makayla!”

“MAKAYLA!”

She finally turned around and said in an annoyed 2 year old little voice,

“UGH! . . . Cheese!”

She thought I wanted to take her picture!

My memory is not what it used to be.  I can get by on my day to day life with post-it notes, reminders on my cell phone or my calendar at work or my amazing family, friends and co-workers that are always there to help me fill in the blanks.  I just got off the phone with my mom asking her if she remembered the story I told above.  I remember it was one of our kids that did it, but I wasn’t sure which one or when and where it happened.

There are other events in my life that I have no recollection of.  Some are big and some are little, but I wished I could get the memories back.   

My own childhood events

Traveling adventures

Reuben’s proposal

           
            Cute stories from our kids

I am so thankful that I have my camera so that I can document special moments in my life.  I will continue taking pictures and adding more photo albums to my collection.  If you see me with my camera indulge me and let me take your picture so I can have these memories with me forever!